Category Archives: Love

Saturday’s Song

I feel gorgeous, I feel stupid
I’ve just made out with Cupid

His red lips sting so sweet, so sore
But I’m telling ya, that demi-god is a hot-bod bore

Standing in my socks and waiting
I thought he’d be more intoxicating

“Fall into my eyes,” he groans, “Gaze, gaze deep.”
Twists his face, barely moans, and yes falls fast, fast asleep

I’ve wasted dinner and an hour!
I’m a sinner, I need a shower

So gorgeous
So stupid
So stupid
But gorgeous, believe it
Take it in, receive it

I compel you don’t I
I compel your third eye
To open
To cry
To cry

I feel gorgeous
I feel stupid
Sing it again
Loop it
Loop it
Gorgeous
Stupid
Gorgeous
Stupid
Gorgeous, stupid

IMG_3867

Like So, a prose poem for lovers of all ages but particularly lovers in their mid to late 20s in major American metropolis centers

And baby like so we enter your sphere of sadness and like so we enter mine and acquiesce and allow the sorrow to break us and break us to silence and like so baby we hold each other in our naked embrace of warm damp skin after our love making is done damn it’s done and through your window we float above the jeweled city lights you and me against the world baby floating here where they can’t touch us or know us as we know each other in this warm cradle safe and removed from the unconscious beehive below us below us baby baby mine so like so we smile and sink in sink in deep and secure in our smug sweaty glow deep in our shared sorrow aching so like so like a cobalt hued river flowing placid still like liquid glass through the carved and carving caverns of our head heart and heavy souls and like so sleep sleep darling in our naked nest our sobbing cocoon until the morning comes begging again for light and life and let us begin again begin again begging again to be like so.

IMG_9497

Love In The Present Epoch

What’s happening with me?
Maybe it’s you, do you feel it too, what’s happening with you?
Maybe it’s the artisanal wine we’ve sipped, so so good, so
Satisfying inside and so affordable too?
Maybe it’s this rain and the song that Spotify just chose?

I’ve truly never felt this close with someone, it’s like the lines have blurred
Our merging hearts caressing
You and I sitting here, legs folded, facing one another
You leaning in to me
Our foreheads touch softly, just enough so that I encounter the strength and armor of your skull but also the kindness of your mind
And perhaps your soul
Each message you’re sending so soft and clear and unique to you yet classic like memes passed down from the ancients
Our faces aglow

Gosh, it’s amazing to me
I’ve never texted like this before
I pray to some all-knowing all-powerful intelligence to let this moment never end and our batteries never die and our wifi never hiccup and our thumbs never tire

Your texts are so intimate tonight
Oh damn, that emoji really turns me on, I’m typing so fast

IMG_0450

Know Thyself

All I’ve known is the known darkness
The isolation from you
The loneliness of me
I suppose this has been the great tragedy, the one I’ve suspected all along
I just want you to know me

Dearest, I just want to be known
I just want to be known so someone can tell me who I am

And, my love, when you know me, it’s true: I will seek the same quiet shelter alone
Find that unused absence of light
Wallow in the lost library
Unseen, blind in the contradiction
As long suspected
In unplanned dreams
In wild lapses
Vino’s veritas

I swear it pains me, it does, dear, as if, as if it were some epic trauma
As if I had once been some exalted god on high, now fallen
Called to this earthy morass of light and dark
Ecstatic pain and agony joy

And I swear
Oh yes on my dearest breath I vow
I will always, I suspect, always blame you, blameless unknowing
Companion

Know me, dear
Mommy daddy lover offspring lord
Know me and tell me who I am

33671887651_5f1d176177_o

A still life observed while enjoying an early evening perfectly warm stroll along the Boardwalk near the sea.

I nearly passed by it
Co-workers on the beach quiet
Lee kissing Lim
Burning skin in intense city dreams
These are the dreams
The dreams life is made of
The dreams it’s so good to be out of

The awe

Fists clenched still
Life presents endless cycles
Endless eruptions of fear elation anxiety
And peace
Even still
In this still, still life

Ah

It’s so good to be out of the office

Neck rolls and shoulder shrugs
Breathe in and close the eyes
Allow the peace to come and call
Leagues below
The depths the soul
The death of the soul

Ah

Fists unclenched
Eyes wide revealing it now
Ah, see them still
Life, why don’t I have this still

Soft sands soft hands
Limber lips
A melting sun

IMG_2715-940x528

The Wild Parrots of Malibu

When we would roam and fly the streets
Onward weaving freedom rides, gentrifying in the wild idyll
On foot on board on bicycle
Salt kiss breezes floating our flowing limbs, our gangly hair, ill-worn cloth and nylon
The Point Dume Bombers were active and alive!
Hey, dear valley, go home, we cried
Retreat with your refuse through oven-walled canyons to the unseen hinterland
Retreat!

When we would squawk and bark the repertoire
Limited, yes and at all hours, yes
Mythologizing the day’s frolic in the sea
Where we daydreamed among waves we called our own, origins unknown and unimagined
Calls of awesome, rad, yar, outer dude!
Burning skin in quick glimpses seen
Wanting to linger across the more virgin skin
Unveiled by a quest for color or the blow of whitewash
That touch so far before us

What filled our minds but the imagined adventure and dark intrigue we gathered from the muffled drunken roars heard late in the night through poorly insulated walls of shoddy renown
Dead whales on the beach
Dead marriages everywhere fouling our neighborhood air
We’d witness TV stars at gasoline pumps, scratching desperate lotto cards
Witness that nothing is certain
No matter how high, how gleaming
Your newly-born platinum wall

When we were parrots we saw more than we understood
Intuiting lessons at the edge of a continent where the outcast and the privileged all lay claim to the intolerable beauty no one can ever let in, lest all pride dissolve back to Malibu dust
And back to Malibu sand
Madness conceived when land meets sea, when fire and water collide
As they everyday do in this thin long burg

When we were wild and knew nothing of the strangeness of death
Only the permanence of parents
Their frailty and conundrum

IMG_1891

Fella. Love, Stella

I found you before you found me
But never ever, ever never
Did our soft souls meet
 
‘Twas desire, our glands, 
Our oven mitt hands, 
fumbling, bumbling, stumbling:
there, there, and
there 
 
Fella
  
those nights
those nights
those nights
 
Fella
 
And then the shenanigans began 
That strange vacation
When I walked in and out but back again
Caught your commonplace sin 
The couch and cushion
Kissin’, pushin’, kissin’
 
I called you a dollar
You called me a whore
Are our lives so much better than they were 
Than they were 
Those days before?
 
Fella
 
When the wallets you wore
Were hooked by a chain
And you never even bothered
To ask my real name
 
You let your beard grow 
Like all your friends did
We called you unique
Like the tattoos your long sleeves hid
 
Fella, you ain’t got no call
Fella, there ain’t no grace in your fall
Fella
 
Maybe it’s time we break and call this quits
I’ll spend half my lifetime recovering from the feel of your zits
On my tits
Itty bitty bits
Betrayals and tricks
Ah crap!
Give me a kiss
On my sour, sour lips
My sour, sour lips
 
Fella
 
IMG_4820
 
 

k-paso in duh neighborhood

Hey Luke!
 
Look, listen:
Lou kissin
Some broad named Tammy 
 
Look, listen:
Lou kissin
Some broad named Mandy 
  
Look, listen:
Lou kissin
Some broad named Alexandra 
 
Oh yeah, Luke, listen: 
Lou pissin 
Off the neighborhood broads
 
You got Tammy and Mandy and some broad called Alexandra
Wah wah – Alexandra – wah wah 
Doopelee dupe duh dee dang dee dang dang 
 
Lou listen: 
Luke’s kissin
Yo momma in duh Kmart parking lot
 
Alexandra! Time for your streusel and viola practice 
 
Get home girl!
 
 
IMG_3272

in the moment

hold me close
keep watch
and remind me always
of tonight
this ease and flow
in the warm breezes
desserts we share
with no calorieeses

I couldn’t love anything more than I love you now
in this moment
I couldn’t love life, god, you, me,
nor whatever god wants to be
more
I couldn’t love history and all its agony and disease
nor evolution nor the seven seas
no, I couldn’t love them more
my cells are not equipped
the butterflies have flipped
every move and perfect breath
another step from perfect death

keep this with me
never let me forget
because at times
too many, you bet
I fear upending
the up ending
is what life has in store
forever and ever
and evermore

 

IMG_1869

Alarm Bells Are Ringing

Somewhere in this room exists the kernel of our mutual betrayal
The faded breath of the fantasy, the faint trace of a dream for one who should have never slept in our bed

I don’t know who encountered it first nor how nor why nor why we can’t find it now
But the silent whisper in our minds still echoes and a seething hate is born

So that every mistake one makes in the dishwasher or with the clumsy toothpaste cap
Escalates into napalm blasts sprung deep from our diaphragm, seeking, soon finding the targets back deep in the soul

I agree with you that I’ve lived my entire life as a midlife crisis
Yet nothing prepared me for our slow grinding agony, our actual crisis at midlife, our soap opera better mocked when it appeared on tv or in the tabloids

There will be no ponytails or Porsches
Until this is all over

Sadly the end feels as elusive as this kernel we hope to find and squash out
We know somewhere in this consciousness it’s done but we require the planting of that actual seed

The suffering of emergence, the revelation, the mutual deaths of our pride
It’ll be the last thing we ever share. And there’s respect and closure and real life in that

Help me end this with you

 

IMG_3859